Thanksgiving Reflections in 2004

December 1, 2004

Family Narrations

Anne Collins

California

Jeremiah 30:19 And out of them shall proceed thanksgiving and the voice of them that make merry: and I will multiply them, and they shall not be few; I will also glorify them, and they shall not be small.

Normally a time filled with the noise and laughter of a houseful of family and friends and a bustling kitchen with good smells from all the preparations, we found ourselves looking forward to spending the day alone. Friends up north who we were to meet had a sudden heath emergency in the family and had to tend to that. Our daughter and family were going to her in-laws and we were invited but didn't feel we wanted to tag along. The neighbors invited us to join their crew but we just didn't think that was what we wanted to do either. We invited our elderly friend who was going to be alone to come over and he enthusiastically accepted. I decided it didn't matter if we only had the one guest, I would create the whole meal myself and not leave out a detail. I wanted it to be special for him anyway. He wouldn't be having too many more special times since he has a bad heart.

The night before, I hopped around, cutting up the brown bread and making the dry bread cubes for the stuffing. I chopped celery and onions and added the spices to the giblets and cooked that for the broth. It was beginning and oh how much fun it was becoming! Funny, but if it had been just Lou and I, we probably wouldn't have bothered but just went to the buffet down the street and saved a lot of time and money. In the morning I got up at 5:30 a.m. and sautéed more celery and onions, chopped up giblets tiny and added that and the spices, broth and butter. The smells were definitely getting me in the mood. Pretty soon the turkey was stuffed and in the oven. I peeled the potatoes, made the fruit salad. Oh, I had berries in the freezer from the garden and blueberries tucked away there too, from a sale to add to the salad. I whipped my cream up firm and held that separate until mealtime. I laid out the vegetables and readied the sweet potatoes to cook. It was all coming together.

I set a beautiful table, complete with crystal, my beautiful serving pieces, cloth linens and my best china. It was ready, all but filling the bowls with the hot, wonderful feast.

Finally, it was almost 1pm and I started mashing potatoes, making gravy, letting the rolls bake, and carving the bird….22# for just 3 of us? Overkill, but then nothing was going to be missing. I sent Lou to pick up our honored guest. He is 91 and we had a feeling this might be the last Thanksgiving we could do for him and I wanted it to be very memorable and perfect. The more I worked, the more I wanted it to be complete and wonderful.

10 minutes later, Lou walked back in….alone and looking so disappointed for me, wondering what would be my reaction. He said, well we have been totally rejected this year, all the way around. My eyes filled with tears and I couldn't believe it. All this preparation, all this work, all this perfection (for I am a good cook, and I especially can do this meal well), and it was left there, untouched, rejected. I tried to find a positive thought to hold me together. I managed to do so, but there was an emptiness that was hard to ignore. I knew that there are reasons for everything, but right then I just felt rejected.

Well, Lou and I ate a wonderful meal, probably the best I have ever made. There was enough leftovers to make 12 full plates to freeze for later! I had enough extra turkey for another 6-8 meals we could dream up much later. I took a plate over to our friend to eat at his house, alone, which is what he apparently wanted.

Much later in bed, trying to fall asleep and thinking over the day, I almost sat up with a start. How many times in the morning, did I rise too late and miss my own well-prepared feast, lovingly prepared for me? For it says, "Man shall not live by bread alone, but by every Word that proceeds from the mouth of God." How very many times have I, by my inconsideration for the preparation that was made, put other things first and by so doing, scorned the One who sits quietly by waiting with the bountiful bowls and baskets of personally prepared nuggets and truths that would have nurtured me and strengthened me for what lay ahead that day. How many days did I go forth spiritually starved and weakened, ripe for every attack of the enemy, unprepared, unarmed, and feeling alone and unloved, when it is I who missed the appointment? It is I who didn't come to the feast, and it is I who rejected Him, the source of my strength and sustenance. What treasure did I miss today? What wonderful new taste of sweetness and strength? What a loss.

I finally realize that each preparation is as full and complete as if it were prepared for a whole congregation of hungry people. And yet it is personally, prepared with the foreknowledge of what I would need for this one day. And tomorrow, He would have another, a unique another, and the next day, a unique another, because He loves me and He is ever faithful, and though I have missed meeting with Him, He is ever faithful. Though His Heart breaks with disappointment in my foolish laxity in keeping this special mealtime precious and a priority, does He ever fail to prepare afresh and anew? Does He ever fail to keep the appointed time? Does He ever choose to give up on me and just not show up? It would never be so. It is I who needs stirring and awakening. It is I who needed a painful picture.

The picture of one Thanksgiving dinner, made fully, but with no guests to enjoy. And even that was not truly so. For the graciousness of the Lord lent me my wonderful husband for another year and he was there to enjoy the meal, to comfort me in my disappointment and to say the right things. But the lesson was still there. May I remember to be ready every morning and enjoy the table prepared only for me from my dear Heavenly Father and never leave Him waiting again.