When spent by time

August 19, 2007

Joel Akin

 I can't say I slept. I lay there and I was tired and I had the entire night in war. It was war for I remember struggling and wrestling. And those are considered spiritual warfare.';

 If I put it into perspective it would be like taking two sleeping pills and they had no affect. I've been here before and if I don't sleep I go up the tree. But suppose this is one time I prayed and felt to take the second pill but it also had no effect.

So if this is the way of the future I need help before I end up going out and peeling snow up with my nose. Even now I'm pressing letters and scrambling to stay awake. Why? Because I lie there and am awake so I figured if I sat here I'd fall asleep. It works for a moment and I find me goiglssssssssss and thus you get the idea.

Now God knows I need rest. He knows I fought last night despite the fact that I was waiting for a word from him. It wasn't easy and it is nearly impossible to hear. It isn't that I fail to try it is that the day doesn't work well if I don't get help.

So what do I do? I sit and wait for God to move. I sit and wait for God to help. I sit and wait for God to see. For if I am moving in my life then I am on the way to God. Now it wasn't apparent at first but it were as if there were upper or lower holes. And there were higher holes. I kept seeing strange things moving and some were people and some were storage units. Each one was a stasis chamber filled with part of our life. But we were not the only ones moving. All of us were. I can't call it a dream but it wasn't fully a waking vision either but whatever it was lasted all night. And it was progressive for I believe it was meant to speak of a move to a new world. I do know one of the most amazing images is that there were boxes like vertical storage units each 12 feet high and connected with another one of different color. So 12 plus feet wide. And these were moving through the air like butterflies as far as the eye could see. They represented the people who will be part of the world I'm moving to. I have been seeing them before in other parts of the dreams. I've talked to them and I wrestled with someone invisible. He spoke once that he was Time.

 I know this is hard to accept as a dream and its harder to accept as reality. I am so tired and yet I can't sleep. After awhile lying there isn't possible to explain.

I do know it is Gods plan to help. I know God knows I need it. I've been here before where I spent to much time awake and lost my ability to reason. And even if that is part of it I know God will aid me. So why then move in the land of the spirit? It is a dream which is reality. When I am not able to sleep God sends me dream fragments to represent things that are right. Right is also the left side of the brain and that is part of what is being hurt. Not by sin or evil but by a time spirit even though that makes sense if you hear a voice say "I am Time". It is a time representing the word of God. God is tired and wore out and knows I am tired and wore out. I can write a few seconds before I drift off. And thus this letter is a struggle to write.

Now if I am in God and God is in me then why the difference? Why is there help and yet not? How can I be helped only on things that seem to be spiritual? The answer is spiritual is on the natural. I need money but I can bear it without. Trust isn't the issue but things are. The thing is I need financial help. I need time.

Yet if God can hear in the midst of hurt and sorrow he can do something about it. He can bear up my fret and my guitar to keep me in tune. For I go up and am still in pain. So what do I do?

I can't answer this without prayer and weeping. I can't just not bear it. I can't even think of not fighting. I have to fight because no one else can. I am me but it isn't just me and my private battle with sickness. I am in a war where I am a general. I am a warrior. And I am in pain. Yet all my life I've heard be a soldier and its like repeating to a pro only in my case I don't seem to be able to rest. And rest may be something a soldier has to have if he is to survive.

So here is a word from God to encourage. I am not mad and not angry. I fought all night as well. I am with you in this war. I am in this with hope that we will destroy the work of the enemy. They have carried on far too long without helping them to the grave. It is time they were destroyed. It is time they were carried there into the dead zone. And though you keep asking for Sin to suffer time he is not going to know it once its all over. It won't matter if he's gone. So if he's gone then he won't bother anyone. And if it comes to pass that one day another rises like him then he will have to suffer much. And if there is another type of evil it also will be dealt with. For God isn't afraid. He has dealt with creature of fic and life. And all are part of the story to come.

The story will change man in his heart and will change the way the world sees. The world will rise up and sing a new song and sing a new word. It is with praise and with song of love. It is with life. It is all things to all people. God will raise up a new word for you and it will be friends. You are sad and lonely and hurt. So God is going to raise up these things when things are soon settled. It is hard to suffer and harder to lift ones head up but that is the way of present circumstances.

So in a way it is time to live. Time to grow. Time to please and be pleasing to others. It isn't possible now but it is going to be possible. It is going to be changed. It is going to be sleep which will be there in full. So you can sleep as needed without worry. And it will be near. For you are sleep oriented and that is the way of men.

Now as to blessings I have said I would own the world. I will make things happen that are fun. I will give gifts to men and I've thought of how. Not all can go to a school but I want you to return as often as you want. I will help you remember. I know you tend to forget everything and it becomes harder to focus. So the day of time will come when you can travel. And that also is close. For if you can see as I see you are not dead inside but struggling to break free.

As far as a rapture in November remember to give thanks to God. For God is going to free it so it can be healed of its coming with turkey. That means its going to be of ham for not all like turkey. Some want ham and that is why thanksgiving was of turkey with the Pilgrims. Most assume it was the wild bird but suppose it ham? That way the wild nature of the pig would be there as a gift to men.

So here is what is to happen this day. Rest as you can. Sleep as you can. Try to fight with prayer tonight. Give time to things that are small. Try to walk and avoid overtaxing yourself with stuff from Ray. That is not to rebuke but think of things as gift and gifts. Ray is a giver but they are things you don't want. Give them to people or give them to others but don't let them burn. People want it and giving them something for free might be nice. Only if you feel up to it.

As far as the day goes I will be with you. I will not forsake it. I will be with your thoughts. And I will protect you from harm and evil. Give time to thought and to prayer and God will heal.

Until then remember to pray for help. For God knows it is a bad time for people who come without understanding. And people know you can walk to a decree.