Suddenly it came to pass

December 20, 2007

Joel Akin

 We live in a world about to pop.

 The world we live in is about to pop.

The world we find inside is too

and yet the still voice of God

like a friend rises higher

and I find the day rises with me

Across the grain of the wood

the still night lies

the still night to lie upon with joy

the still night of time compressed

it is the night of Christ

born upon a manger

carried into a way

 It is the night to see

when Christ carries me up to him

to see the manger story in real world

to see it as it happened

for in Heaven they carry it to the sea

and they carry it to the lee

and they raise it to me

that I would carry it to the sea

for in me is the life of the Spirit

 Alone at last I find the time to write a few words before Christmas. I have felt a certain sorrow that I have had so few minutes to compose poetry. I try to write things from inside the heart but I feel like I'm bent and twice folded.

 I have been in prayer for the life inside and outside around me. I have sought God for the issue of trans fats even while I grow fat. I have sought God to help me in this because I try to eat less and yet each day I still grow fat. Is it me or is it the fat or is it the fact they take out the fat?

 It is also my heart to see an answer. I have sought God tonight in a way I don't think I've ever done. I asked him to go to the super extreme. I've asked for help to overcome and I asked God to literally do everything He can to restore us to fellowship.

 It is also true I don't want to suffer so great that I can't live. There have been a number of times it has hurt so bad that it would be preferable to die then continue on. Its not that I can't bear pain but that some pain takes me to a point of white light. It is the highest intensity of life without death. And it is painful. So painful I can't breathe.

 There is a story I am in and it is a big one. I know it is a story and yet at time I feel as if I'm at war with this spirit in a way that he is just a foe I fight each day. I fight with him knowing he'll carry me to suffering if he can. I know he'll fight me inside and out. I know he'll try my family. I know he'll steel away things. I call him a coward at times and I don't think he likes  it. There are other times he can offend without even trying. And sometimes I think I get through, at least for a time with some of my anger.

 Who will read this without wondering if I should tell someone. I do. I talk to mom and dad about it. They talk about their war and their battle and I know they suffer. Yet who is there for me to share with? I share here and with people on Helium. Only Helium is a why I write. So I go there with focus. Here I generally twist and wend my way to a story.

 Of course the story is of Christmas. It is the Christmas tree which I miss helping sis to find. Of course if I had my way I'd have a property and cut down a tree each Christmas and bring it home and help to decorate it.

 I've started collecting Christmas stuff over the past few years and have a few nice treasures. And yet as time passes I ask "Why" and I know it is war. It is Sin. It is fight. It is wen or chance. It is be or life. It is time. It is the big enchilada. It is corn. It is Hope and hope and cat and help of life in general. It is all things. It is help for the poor. It is help to life. It is help of people. It is the bay of pigs. And that is part of the mystery to life. I have it in me to write on the story of it one time soon I hope.

 I have so many things I want to write. I dream of a better software which gives me a way of writing a book without fear it will fail. And yet I can and do write here. I can and do write in pages. I can and do write but when I think of it I find it isn't fun to read.

 I have a hundred chapter book on the rapture and one on the ozone hole only I can't find what I want and I don't really read. It is the time of life to pray for wealth.

 In that guard God will help. He will carry up the wee little things and point them back with why. That is try to see a way of building up a way to do things your way. In other words who writes software? Who does a good job? If they can find it to see then write it with them. Start a company for writers. Make it huge and big. Find a way of making it the story of life. Make it news. Make it time.

 Money will arrive. It isn't that I write this alone. I have heard it would arrive soon. I thought I heard it would come by this Christmas. Yet I also thought it would be here by Thanksgiving so if I am wrong then God help me. For I think it was in the hands of God when someone tried it. They took it and they broke it upon the head of a man. It was in the head of man and in the head of sea. It is the Spirit of God.

 Don't let sin take the lee away. Don't let those things stop you from dreaming. Find it in the lee. Find it in the sea. Find it in the dream. Find a way of making a clue to the sea. Find the time to breathe.

 For in the way of life there is a gift to you called hope. It is the hope of things and the hope of a dream. It is the gift of Hope to find the way. It is the gift of freedom to see. It is the gift of life to know the battle. It is the gift of time. It is the gift of freedom.

 For the God of Gods isn't the God of Gods but the God of all Gods in life.

 Those things which come first at the season of trial. They are the bitter flake. They are the coarse fill. They are the things in the sea. They are the breathing of life into the dream. It is the bit by bit that fills up life. It is the bit of the dream. It is the bit of the sea.

 For when the battle is the sea and the son has set the will of men will be done. The will of God is not to fight with you but to whiten the heart. He wants to free you. He wants you to see. And so the will of God is to see. He wants you to breathe and know the e is there but only in the breath of it. If one breathes they go into the breath of life. And so the e is the final solution. It is God. God takes the El and the Elohim. He is the God of sea and the God of love. He is God.