To many things happening

February 13, 2008 Wednesday

Joel Akin

Psalms 46:10 Be still, and know that I [am] God: I will be exalted among the heathen, I will be exalted in the earth.

The story is simple. War. It is just a few days ago when my father had a simple problem. An unknown obstruction in his bowel. He was given an idea it could be cancer and off he went to the hospital. We live in a house that is in a doctors office on average 3 times each week. Of course they are all different doctors and types but the idea is we are a family in battle. No one goes to a doctor unless they have to.

 Now the point of a doctor is to aid but the doctor I deal with is God. I could point to a few times when I might have gone to a doctor. Instead I took authority and ran. Not to the doctor but to the floor or to the bed in prayer.

Now it is a war. War is when you are in war. War is when you fight. Fight is the battle of soul. Not with men but with spirits of lie and divination. They are the diviners of lies and dying. They predict a person will die and they try to make it a reality. They go out and bill the person with suffering. They put in sickness and disease. They aid with pain and sharp and then sharper pain. They bill you with suffering. They put on evil and vile. They take away joy and then strive to work on hope. It all goes on and on and on.

 Yet who would think it of our family? For today we had my brother on the way for coffee with dad. Mom was asleep in bed. Dad was in the kitchen with me and I was toasting some new Eggo waffles I had just purchased. I wanted them as I was getting tired of cereal and eggs with toast. Not that dad was a bad cook but he had been sleeping in since he got back from the nursing care home.

Now it was today while we were standing there that dad cried out. I am used to it and didn't react except to look at him. I waited and he said "That was the ''''defibrilator' though I don't think he said it, the worst I've had... ever. I grapped him and felt like the Lord said to seat him just a fraction of a moment before he was hit a second time. This time dad started crying out. He was getting kicked by a wallop in the heart and I was trying to hear God.

 It was here where a lot of things took place at once. I know it sounds strange but time extended. It had to for Dad was going into spasm and looked like he was about to die. I was on the phone because dad was saying call 911. I was on the phone as dad continued to get hit by the heart pain. I was giving him a word from the Lord but it was before the call to 911.

 The point is the Holy Spirit gave dad a message. First that he was not going to die and then in tears from the Holy Spirit that he loved him more then any man. I was a powerful word and I grabbed dad in the midst of his third hit as his body arched. I covered him with my body trying to protect him from what I thought might be a direct spiritual attack.

Now it was around the third and fourth that I made the 911 call. I knew it was serious and it wasn't ending. God was sharing with me it was 'time' and there was a spirit that interrupted and said it wasn't really him. It does make sense but it was a wild few minutes.

Now all this was happening in relative quiet. That is no one but dad and I were in the kitchen. Mom was having around this time an appointment with the bathroom as she woke up with a severe bout of stomach problems. She could not come out to see what was happening. I was wearing out by now and asking God for strength. I don't have a lot of vitality. I was draining quickly and pulled up a chair and supported him from behind. The ambulance was on its way. About this time mom and Steve came into the picture. Steve came in and started praying. Then mom and the four of us surrounded him in prayer. Lynda may have come in a little later but that was part of her story of having to call in to work to say she wasn't coming in.

Mom got the front door open and the firemen, three of them, came in. They worked on him with some basic questions. I just remember three things about their visit. One was the size of their clothing. Two was the snow they had tracked in. It seemed we had a semi-blizzard during the night and I was going to shovel but Steve ended up doing that. Probably a good thing.

 Then the paramedics arrived. They were able to get him out to the ambulance. It was at this point I later learned his had six more episodes in the ambulance and at the garage at the hospital. It seems that he was surrounded with nurses as it was thought to be a critical emergency. That is the only time you get surrounded by nurses.

Now it was here that Steve, Lynda, Mom and I had a brief visit. We prayed and I was the only one sitting there not having much strength. I do know God helped me as I felt well enough to support dad in the kitchen chair until the ambulance people came and took him away.

 One thing God had me shout at dad and it was for my own benefit as well was this was not Gods idea. It was a war and it was part of the war. Did God forsee it? That is the point of measure. God foresaw it but didn't want it. It is like seeing a friend in the body without anyone to help. So in this case our family had to be there. It was the only way we could all survive the trial that would be.

Now that is like seeing more. I guess it is the battle one doesn't want. But if they have a problem with the heart pace kick and so on they will have to operate. That isn't easy. It would be in and out but if it is defective they would have to repair it or remove it. Either way it isn't perfect a solution. If God were to return he could do either but it isn't time.

Time is the base of this story. I don't have all of it but I have some. Some is enough but more is wanted. I am telling the story of how all this mess is taking place. That means I am part of the battle. The battle is the heart over the leaf. The leaf is part of me and I am part of the war. I am overwhelmed with exhaustion.

Now the defibrillator is not an easy piece to fix. Yet they were able to remove the shock part by putting on a magnet. The magnet is there to stop the continual shocking part. Having it removed would aid him in the mental sense. Knowing it is there is one thing but if it had not malfunctioned they could point to him and his heart. That would mean an end to driving.

Thus time becomes the mixed part of the blessing. If there has to be a problem let it be in the way it took place. With family there. I was the strong man but the weak one as well. I had to be strong.

Now I know this is a valid day of prayer but I am wore out wondering why. God hasn't really indicated the why. I believe part of it is the battle over me. I am a battle inside because I am disconnected in some way. I can't seem to keep myself in tune. I am me but part of me is gone or missing in action. That is part that doesn't really bother me but probably should. I look at it as one part failure and one part continuous exhaustion. The point of all is that I can't find anyone to listen with all the turmoil in our family.

So here I write it as it is. Knowing I am on the path to helping man yet having a battle that is taking me and my family into war. It seemed to be there before I learned about prayer yet it is part of the war. It is part of the season of prayer. It is part of the battle.

 God doesn't faint. He knows the will of men. He knows the heart of life. He knows they want to make it a surprise. Yet sometimes an encouraging word is more important then life. So the point of life is to see that. They do and they know the life in me is capable of making it. They know I don't like that to be the point of encouragement.

 The they is period. Period is the point of spirits who eat awful things. They do so knowing the point of it is to give up. Thus I give up in the sense of not trying. I give up but I don't. I keep going. Of course the point is my father. It is also war. It is also God. God is on the path to leaf and life. He is on the way. He is going to make me a wealthy man. He is going to deliver and carry me onward to victory. He is going to deliver me from the dark mumble jumble of their lies. God is going to help me find a way. He is going to heal me. He is going to keep working with me until I find a way.

God is with me. He is going to be with me. He is going to heal me. He is going to see me to the finish. This is the best of things. God is going to deliver. That deliver is the point of me in the sea of life. I can't sleep and I can't seem to stay awake. I am always in war. I want more encouragement. I want to see doors open. I want God to take more direct vocalization in the story. And that is part where God does as well. He is not off or asleep. He is well assured that I am on the right path. It is just time.

 Now let God deal with it. Let him find it in the way of life. Find time to breathe and enjoy. He is not going to turn away nor leave you or forsake you. It is the day of life and the day of hope. Those are things yet to come. God is going to deliver what is best. He is going to heal and help. He is going to hear and believe with me. God is going to help me find time. He is going to see me find a way. He is going to make sure there is no one who can hinder. He is God. He is God who makes way after way. He is God.